A Disappointing Evening in Puerto Rico: Serrano Out With Injury, Jake Paul KOs Yet Another Tomato Can

By Amy A Kaplan - 03/02/2024 - Comments

Well, if you were looking for a masterclass in how not to host a boxing event, this was it. The night kicked off with Amanda Serrano calling off her fight due to an eye injury, leaving her scheduled battle with Nina Meinke dead in the water. Instead, we were ‘treated’ to Jake Paul playing whack-a-mole with Ryan Bourland.

Jake Paul racked up yet another win, this time showing Ryan Bourland the exit in record time, leaving the crowd barely any time to get comfy in their seats. Bourland, making a comeback to the spotlight for the first time since his hiatus in September 2022, probably wished he’d pushed his vacation out a bit longer. Right from the jump, Paul was on him, slicing through Bourland’s guard with jabs as if he was in a hurry to wrap this up and catch a movie. But why stop at jabs? Paul decided to throw in a solid right to the body, just for the heck of it. Treating Bourland like his personal punching bag, Paul delivered a jab to the gut followed by an uppercut, looking like he was checking off moves from a beginner’s boxing guide. Bourland, looking more unstable than a one-legged stool, was easy pickings. Trapped and pummeled, his only option was to endure the onslaught Paul unleashed on him.

Paul, with the finesse of a sledgehammer, delivered a combo that had Bourland questioning his life choices as the ref put an end to the spectacle.

After the dust settled, Paul snatched up the mic, oozing the kind of swagger you’d expect from someone who’d just gone toe-to-toe with a sack of potatoes. With the spotlight shining down on him like a beacon of delusion, he called out none other than Canelo Álvarez, the pound-for-pound king, a move so bold it borders on comedic genius.

Then there were Jonathan Gonzalez and Rene Santiago, who seemed more interested in a hug fest than a fight, with Gonzalez barely scraping by with a victory. I had Santiago winning.

Christopher Diaz decided to shake off two years of rust against Headley Scott, who seemed to forget he was in a fight and not a retirement party. Diaz, perhaps out of pity, put Scott out of his misery in the second round, making us all wonder why we were still watching.

Elijah Flores and Alejandro Munera gave us a few moments of entertainment, at least until Flores decided he’d had enough and sent Munera packing in the fourth round.

The super flyweight bout between Krystal Rosado and Gloria Munguilla was a beacon of mediocrity in a sea of disappointment, with Rosado eking out a win that had the crowd booing.

And then there was the spectacle of 17-year-old Javon Walton and Joshua Torres, which ended in a draw that had everyone asking if there was a refund policy for time wasted. Walton seemed to be giving a seminar on how not to lose a fight rather than trying to win it.

Finally, Omar Pacheco and Christopher Ortiz ended in a draw that had the audience checking their watches and wondering if the parking lot was still full. Pacheco’s knockdown seemed like a highlight until you realized it was the only thing worth mentioning.

In summary, if you missed this night of boxing, consider yourself lucky. You probably had a more thrilling evening sorting your sock drawer.

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